For those who know what being a defense officer's child means, I need not give an explanation. However for those who don't, well let me put it this way that you live in an altogether different UNIVERSE....
You are the protected brood of the entire cantonment and every uncle and aunty is closer than family. Festivals also take a much more zealous and brighter hue.
One particular incident that I can recall is a HOLI that we played at the AIR FORCE SELECTION BOARD, VARANASI in the year 1998. My father was the President of the Board during those days, hence he was called the MAHARAJ....
There were around 15-odd officers' families who had decided to collect at the Air Force Institute to play Holi with each other. The Star of the show was Wg Cdr S K Sharma.
"Sir, chalo. I have made all the arrangements at the Institute." said Sharma Uncle to Papa.
''Morning SK, Happy Holi!" saying this Papa put a handful of colour on Sharma Uncle's face.
"Sir, let's play there only. We all will have a lot of fun there. There are Thandai, Pakoras and all types of colours. I have even asked the boys to get some Bhaang for us."
So we all bustling with joy and enthusiasm reached the Institute. The arrangement was as promised full of opportunities to colour each other.
The boys(the helping staff in the Board) put on the music and we all started playing.
"Take a SHOT!" saying this I hurled a water balloon on my sister Bulbul (whom I fondly call Bul).
By the way, Bul had to appear for her class 10th board a day after Holi and so did Abhi, Sharma Uncle's son. Yet such events were treated as minor impediments by all.
We had been playing Holi for an hour when a round of Thandai and Pakoras was passed around. They were not laced but woven with Bhaang!
"Mamma, why does this Pakora look so green?" asked Megha innocently. Megha is Sood Uncle's daughter and Sood Uncle is Gp Cpt Sood.
"I don't know."
"But they taste really good, isn't it Punita Ma'am?" she said to my mother.
Within minutes of consuming those eatables, all the Uncles and the Aunties who had been sitting down and enjoying Holi, Got Up!
"What is this sound?" Sood Uncle inquired when all of a sudden, we heard a loud horn coming from one of the rooms inside.
There emerged Sharma Uncle with a cap perched on his head to which were attached like horns, two strips of shiny paper that unfolded erect on blowing into a whistle that was also attached to the cap.
He came and very ceremoniously placed the cap on my father's head and said:
MAHARAJ KI JAI HO!
As if on cue, all the officers queued up to bow before their boss. The scene was hilarious, even the boys were having a good time watching their 'Sirs and Ma'ams' make a fool of themselves.
The dirty Holi with beer, slush and ice commenced. All of us were on the dance floor shouting, dancing and playing Holi. One could hear the hails of 'Maharaj Ki Jai Ho!' followed by the blowing of the horn more than the music. The boys ensured that there was an endless flow of Bhaang in all its form. Highly decorated and disciplined officers were prancing around like kids and making complete fools of themselves!
But it was FUN!
"Bul don't drink too much of this, you have an exam." said I to my sister who had already downed 5 glasses of Bhaang Thandai.
So much of Bhaang and physical activity had turned on the hunger in all to ravenous proportions.All of us heaped pulao, daal, dry vegetable, raita and salad on our plates. By the time we came to the third helping, there was only pulao, daal and raita to be had.
In the meanwhile the Holi continued and so did the dancing to the music.
My father heard comments like:
"Sir we are your Praja and we are so happy with you." said a lady officer serving under my father.
"I love you Sir!" declared Sharma Uncle.
Not to be left behind, Sood Uncle shouted "Maharaj Ki Jai Ho!"
The lunch too dragged into the evening. The boys came up to Papa and said
"Sir, all the food has finished and there's nothing left even for us. "
"Ok, Chaps and Ladies....." said Papa addressing the gathering " let's call it a day. Food is finished to the last morsel and these boys are also tired."
Dejectedly, the party broke up. All of us returned home while chanting 'Maharaj Ki Jai Ho!', even the Maharaj!
It took all of us more than a couple of days to come out of the stupor, more than a week to get off the colour and probably more than a lifetime to get over the spirit of HOLI!
Saturday 30 March 2013
Wednesday 20 March 2013
UNDER THE WEATHER!
Well, it has been a long time since I last posted. But that is because I have been under the weather and quite literally so!
This allergic reaction to the changing weather has cost me my peace of mind!
It has cost me my vital senses of TOUCH, SIGHT, SMELL, HEARING, TASTE and even the Sixth SENSE of INTUITION!
It has become a herculean task for me to speak two coherent sentences without any sneeze in between them. I am either rushing to finish my sentences(gulping away any sneeze that erupts midway) or end up finishing a couple of the sentences in a duration of five minutes!
Well, what do I do in those five minutes? I finish the ordeal of unsuccessfully suppressing a sneeze that eventually comes out with double the force. I wipe my nose, which by the way has come to resemble a fully ripe, golf-ball sized, waiting to burst RED TOMATO! After having borne the physical strain, my mental faculties try to fathom my situation, which I lose track of, the moment I SNEEZE!
My eyes are glassy and bloodshot. I have even been hauled up by a traffic police-woman for DRUNK DRIVING in BROAD DAYLIGHT! I have started wearing sunglasses, although the situation is very grim.
I cannot smell, I even gulped down some blue-coloured kerosene thinking it to be my favourite bubbly, BLUE LAGOON MOCKTAIL! My taste buds and the gutts mocked me for sure after that!
My ears can hear a constant 'TING' in them. I cannot hear myself so I shout in my shrill alien voice which is like Chinese radio mixed with Thai FM for others.
NOW I know why others are avoiding me like the PLAGUE! (Speaks volumes about my intuition by the way.)
I have lost my appetite also! Everything tastes like chalk!
Oh I am so HOME-SICK and miss my mum's cooking and my father's caressing words!
I know I sound so DESPERATE....but that is what I am right now.
I think I should end my post now before it goes out of hand and out of the nose literally.
P.S. I sneezed 27 times to write these few lines.
GOD BLESS ME!
This allergic reaction to the changing weather has cost me my peace of mind!
It has cost me my vital senses of TOUCH, SIGHT, SMELL, HEARING, TASTE and even the Sixth SENSE of INTUITION!
It has become a herculean task for me to speak two coherent sentences without any sneeze in between them. I am either rushing to finish my sentences(gulping away any sneeze that erupts midway) or end up finishing a couple of the sentences in a duration of five minutes!
Well, what do I do in those five minutes? I finish the ordeal of unsuccessfully suppressing a sneeze that eventually comes out with double the force. I wipe my nose, which by the way has come to resemble a fully ripe, golf-ball sized, waiting to burst RED TOMATO! After having borne the physical strain, my mental faculties try to fathom my situation, which I lose track of, the moment I SNEEZE!
My eyes are glassy and bloodshot. I have even been hauled up by a traffic police-woman for DRUNK DRIVING in BROAD DAYLIGHT! I have started wearing sunglasses, although the situation is very grim.
I cannot smell, I even gulped down some blue-coloured kerosene thinking it to be my favourite bubbly, BLUE LAGOON MOCKTAIL! My taste buds and the gutts mocked me for sure after that!
My ears can hear a constant 'TING' in them. I cannot hear myself so I shout in my shrill alien voice which is like Chinese radio mixed with Thai FM for others.
NOW I know why others are avoiding me like the PLAGUE! (Speaks volumes about my intuition by the way.)
I have lost my appetite also! Everything tastes like chalk!
Oh I am so HOME-SICK and miss my mum's cooking and my father's caressing words!
I know I sound so DESPERATE....but that is what I am right now.
I think I should end my post now before it goes out of hand and out of the nose literally.
P.S. I sneezed 27 times to write these few lines.
GOD BLESS ME!
Wednesday 6 March 2013
SALAD DAYS!
Now since I am talking about FIRSTS, here is another first that I would like to talk to you about.
I took my first CBSE exams when I was 14 years old and studying in AFBBS, Lodhi Road, New Delhi. The center for our exams was some school in Defence Colony. The last of our exams was the Social Studies one. My school gang had 15 buddies and buddies in the real sense of the word. We covered each other's a@#%*, defended each other and when the time came even gave a tight slap across the face to the one in NEED!
It so happened that on the last day of the exams, Siphti Sandhu decided to throw her postponed birthday party in THE DEF COL NIRULAS'. Amazing it was!! None of us could sleep the previous night, not because of the impending exam but because of the PARTY!
It was the first time that I was going to a party over which my parents had no control. The formality of the exam was got over with by 12 noon and we were free birds till June! I think I must give you a brief idea of my group now. The boys outnumbered the girls in our gang, we all came from middle class houses,except Siphti whose father was the regional transporter of milk for Nestle' back in the 90s and we all were above-average students who were infamous as being the smartest, the most talented and the naughtiest in the school. There were no couples in our group however, we knew that within our group there were a few cupid's arrows flying around.
"Come on!" shouted Manu to me Varuna and me. "You can discuss the papers once we are there."
"Kya yaar, you brainies don't need to worry. As it is, it was your favourite: HISTORY, Suditi." complained Namit coming over to us.
"Wow! Mercedes, BMW, Porsche, Audi!" exchanged the boys among themselves.
But let me clarify that these WERE NOT the cars that we saw but the GIRLS that we saw strolling on the road that day. I distinctly remember Dheeraj and Manas marginally escaped a beating from a girl's boyfriend. They were checking out her GAIT a tad too closely!
It took us fifteen minutes to reach Nirulas' from our exam center. We all went inside and began waiting for Siphti's mother who was expected to come with the cars, the cake and the cash. Aunty was somehow delayed . We were occupying two tables in the eatery. It was the peak lunch hour then.
Around 1pm we saw a middle-aged man walk into the joint with a young beautiful girl on his arm. She addressed him as 'Sir' and he called her 'Neha'.
Neha and Sir occupied the table just behind mine. Artificial foliage separated our backs. Seeing this all the boys; Namit, Parag, Arun, Manu, Apoorva, Raghav, Dheeraj and Manas clambered to my table. All the girls were quickly deported to the other table except me because I was one of the boys.
That Sir, sat on the same side of the table as that of Neha and that was at our backs. Sir put his arm around Neha and his hand came to rest on the curve of the sofa's back.
Neha was quite a dish: tall, fair, amazing stats, soft voice and long hair. The boys took turns to cross her table to catch a glimpse of her. One of the boys made a pass at her, which amused Neha no end. However, the Sir was miffed. He called the staff and probably complained about us. The next time when Raghav got up to take the by then customary round of the table, he was firmly seated down by the same staff member.
The boys were upset, very upset. They decided to take the matter in their hands.
Manu put a drop of tomato sauce from the bottle on our table, on the Sir's hand. The Sir was ignorant of this decoration and moved his hand in Neha's long black hair. Nothing happened.
Next was Raghav who decided to put a blob of mustard sauce on the Sir's hand. This time the Sir was roused. He took out his arm and stared at his hand. An uproar of suppressed laughter ensued from us.
"Eww! What is this Sir?" inquired Neha desperately.
Sir turned and gave a LOOK to all of us. Neha lovingly wiped the Sir's hand.
"Oh My! I think I have spoilt even your hair." said Sir to Neha.
The Sir stood up! He gave a long menacing look to us unruly bunch of teenagers who were falling all over the place in peels of laughter. He summoned the same staff-member and ordered for us to be deported.
We were asked to relocate to outside the hall in the small lawn of the eatery. It was such a DISGRACE yet was SHORT-LIVED!
The lawn of Nirula's was an even better arena for us to display our antics. There was a sprinkler there for the grass.
Siphti, Ritu, Pragya, Varuna, Alka and Tillotama decided to indulge. There was mayhem then. A large crowd of boys stood around the gate watching the whole show. Namit got up to take charge of the situation.
"Get back, all of you right now!" he shouted.
Siphti showed him her tongue and her thumb. She continued frolicking.
"Is your mum coming or are we here to make fools of ourselves?" demanded Dheeraj, sensing that the situation could soon turn unmanageable.
"She is on her way. Have patience Dheeraj!" she shouted back.
Arun and Parag said that they were leaving. They were the most weak-willed and unadventurous of the lot.
"Oh come on both of you!" Siphti implored.
Just then the same staff-member appeared and told us to leave.
"You people have created a ruckus here, not ordered anything to eat and it has been close to two hours now. So please leave!"
"But her mother is on her way here." said I pointing towards Siphti.
"Sorry. You all will have to leave."
"What Siphti? How will we go home now?" asked Alka.
"Don't worry, yaar I'll just call my father."
"You will have to go out and call him." persevered the employee(it was not the cellphone age).
All of us were woebegone, hungry and dejected. We gathered our bags and neared the exit. Just then Siphti's mother entered with the entourage of three Tata Safari cars!
"Yippee! Mamma's here!!"
"See we are from good families, we don't lie." said Namit to the employee.
Now that prick of an employee held his head, hung low!
We told Aunty about all the atrocities meted out to us during our brief stay at the eatery. The employee was grandly reprimanded by her!
We had the cake-cutting and then the cake-fight ceremony in the lawn of Nirula's. All the others could just stand and stare helplessly.
After enjoying our PARTY for two hours we decided to call it a day and departed for our homes at 4pm.
All the staff and the owner heaved a sigh of relief on our exit.
Today whenever I see a bunch of teenagers having a good time, I recall my Salad Days with my close friends. The smallest of things could be the source of the biggest of joys then.
Thanks to social networking I am in touch with most of my friends. One of them is an actor, the other a research scientist, many others engineers working with MNCs and one even a teacher with an NGO.
I took my first CBSE exams when I was 14 years old and studying in AFBBS, Lodhi Road, New Delhi. The center for our exams was some school in Defence Colony. The last of our exams was the Social Studies one. My school gang had 15 buddies and buddies in the real sense of the word. We covered each other's a@#%*, defended each other and when the time came even gave a tight slap across the face to the one in NEED!
It so happened that on the last day of the exams, Siphti Sandhu decided to throw her postponed birthday party in THE DEF COL NIRULAS'. Amazing it was!! None of us could sleep the previous night, not because of the impending exam but because of the PARTY!
It was the first time that I was going to a party over which my parents had no control. The formality of the exam was got over with by 12 noon and we were free birds till June! I think I must give you a brief idea of my group now. The boys outnumbered the girls in our gang, we all came from middle class houses,except Siphti whose father was the regional transporter of milk for Nestle' back in the 90s and we all were above-average students who were infamous as being the smartest, the most talented and the naughtiest in the school. There were no couples in our group however, we knew that within our group there were a few cupid's arrows flying around.
"Come on!" shouted Manu to me Varuna and me. "You can discuss the papers once we are there."
"Kya yaar, you brainies don't need to worry. As it is, it was your favourite: HISTORY, Suditi." complained Namit coming over to us.
"Wow! Mercedes, BMW, Porsche, Audi!" exchanged the boys among themselves.
But let me clarify that these WERE NOT the cars that we saw but the GIRLS that we saw strolling on the road that day. I distinctly remember Dheeraj and Manas marginally escaped a beating from a girl's boyfriend. They were checking out her GAIT a tad too closely!
It took us fifteen minutes to reach Nirulas' from our exam center. We all went inside and began waiting for Siphti's mother who was expected to come with the cars, the cake and the cash. Aunty was somehow delayed . We were occupying two tables in the eatery. It was the peak lunch hour then.
Around 1pm we saw a middle-aged man walk into the joint with a young beautiful girl on his arm. She addressed him as 'Sir' and he called her 'Neha'.
Neha and Sir occupied the table just behind mine. Artificial foliage separated our backs. Seeing this all the boys; Namit, Parag, Arun, Manu, Apoorva, Raghav, Dheeraj and Manas clambered to my table. All the girls were quickly deported to the other table except me because I was one of the boys.
That Sir, sat on the same side of the table as that of Neha and that was at our backs. Sir put his arm around Neha and his hand came to rest on the curve of the sofa's back.
Neha was quite a dish: tall, fair, amazing stats, soft voice and long hair. The boys took turns to cross her table to catch a glimpse of her. One of the boys made a pass at her, which amused Neha no end. However, the Sir was miffed. He called the staff and probably complained about us. The next time when Raghav got up to take the by then customary round of the table, he was firmly seated down by the same staff member.
The boys were upset, very upset. They decided to take the matter in their hands.
Manu put a drop of tomato sauce from the bottle on our table, on the Sir's hand. The Sir was ignorant of this decoration and moved his hand in Neha's long black hair. Nothing happened.
Next was Raghav who decided to put a blob of mustard sauce on the Sir's hand. This time the Sir was roused. He took out his arm and stared at his hand. An uproar of suppressed laughter ensued from us.
"Eww! What is this Sir?" inquired Neha desperately.
Sir turned and gave a LOOK to all of us. Neha lovingly wiped the Sir's hand.
"Oh My! I think I have spoilt even your hair." said Sir to Neha.
The Sir stood up! He gave a long menacing look to us unruly bunch of teenagers who were falling all over the place in peels of laughter. He summoned the same staff-member and ordered for us to be deported.
We were asked to relocate to outside the hall in the small lawn of the eatery. It was such a DISGRACE yet was SHORT-LIVED!
The lawn of Nirula's was an even better arena for us to display our antics. There was a sprinkler there for the grass.
Siphti, Ritu, Pragya, Varuna, Alka and Tillotama decided to indulge. There was mayhem then. A large crowd of boys stood around the gate watching the whole show. Namit got up to take charge of the situation.
"Get back, all of you right now!" he shouted.
Siphti showed him her tongue and her thumb. She continued frolicking.
"Is your mum coming or are we here to make fools of ourselves?" demanded Dheeraj, sensing that the situation could soon turn unmanageable.
"She is on her way. Have patience Dheeraj!" she shouted back.
Arun and Parag said that they were leaving. They were the most weak-willed and unadventurous of the lot.
"Oh come on both of you!" Siphti implored.
Just then the same staff-member appeared and told us to leave.
"You people have created a ruckus here, not ordered anything to eat and it has been close to two hours now. So please leave!"
"But her mother is on her way here." said I pointing towards Siphti.
"Sorry. You all will have to leave."
"What Siphti? How will we go home now?" asked Alka.
"Don't worry, yaar I'll just call my father."
"You will have to go out and call him." persevered the employee(it was not the cellphone age).
All of us were woebegone, hungry and dejected. We gathered our bags and neared the exit. Just then Siphti's mother entered with the entourage of three Tata Safari cars!
"Yippee! Mamma's here!!"
"See we are from good families, we don't lie." said Namit to the employee.
Now that prick of an employee held his head, hung low!
We told Aunty about all the atrocities meted out to us during our brief stay at the eatery. The employee was grandly reprimanded by her!
We had the cake-cutting and then the cake-fight ceremony in the lawn of Nirula's. All the others could just stand and stare helplessly.
After enjoying our PARTY for two hours we decided to call it a day and departed for our homes at 4pm.
All the staff and the owner heaved a sigh of relief on our exit.
Today whenever I see a bunch of teenagers having a good time, I recall my Salad Days with my close friends. The smallest of things could be the source of the biggest of joys then.
Thanks to social networking I am in touch with most of my friends. One of them is an actor, the other a research scientist, many others engineers working with MNCs and one even a teacher with an NGO.
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